One of the things I like about getting older is that I can do things I was afraid to do when I was younger. Had a late lunch with a friend today at the Old Ebbitt Grill and ate raw oysters and drank white wine and generally gossiped and chatted and had a fine old time.
But the most fun was before we were seated, when John Ashcroft came pushing his sour old face through the crowd at the door and had to walk right past us. I had plenty of time to give him the evil eye, which, I admit, I would have done when I was younger. But when he was directly even with us, I launched into a loud discussion about calico cats, loud, and rude, and mean-spirited. He turned the most satisfying shade of red, from the neck of his long wool coat to the top of his Criscoed-hair, got bug-eyed, and pushed his way out the door. As my friend Katrina likes to say: “I’m only going to get worse.”
I’d have kicked him, but I wanted to get my lunch. Which was very good.
Let the Eagle Soar, Hecate!
ReplyDeleteGreat story!
Goddamn - I love you so much.
ReplyDeleteyou are just awesome -
Bwa HA HA HA HA HAH A HAHAHHHAAAA!!
ReplyDeleteThat is fucking priceless.
(for what it's worth, I've gotten more fearless as I've gotten older too.)
Hey, Asscrack! What do you think of the Venus De Milo's pouting breasts?!
ReplyDeleteIt's not boldness with older age, it's the poise and discretion to lay down the Right shit at the Right time. Admirably well done.
ReplyDeleteAll Hail Hecate! OK, maybe it's on a par with Brian of Nazareth painting Romani Ite Domum! (or Romanus Eunt Domus! before being uh...schooled shall we say) but I digress. Brava!
ReplyDeletei have always said that you were fucking evil.
ReplyDeletenow this proves it.
good for you. ican't wait until my kids are done school i am going to be the biggest prick to repubs
ReplyDeleteI love you.
ReplyDeleteNext time kick him in the nuts or flash a tit. He would never recover from either.
ReplyDeleteHas there ever been a more perfect moment? Brava!
ReplyDelete/standing ovation
I want to have your babies!
ReplyDeleteHecate,
ReplyDeleteI am male, but I want to have your children too.
You have to send that to Wonkette. That is funny.
ReplyDelete