Lately, I've been at several gatherings where one of the women wanted to introduce her significant other and the gentleman involved offered up, "I'm her consort." The first time, I think the guy was making an affectionate joke:" She's such a princess; I guess I must be her consort. "
On December 24th, my friend Renee, an incredibly gifted cook, had a bunch of folks over for a traditional Polish Yule dinner. One of the women there, Angela, is a minister and the priestess of a fairly large circle. She has a new (and delightful) significant other. They're too old to be "boyfriend and girlfriend." "Lover" sounds a bit, I don't know, like too much information, somehow. So one of the other guests who knows both of them suggested "Consort of the Reverened One." The gentleman involved was delighted with the phrase and kept repeating it with a smile.
I like "consort" better than "boyfriend," "lover," or "significant other." And I love living in a world where a guy would be delighted to be called "Consort of the Reverened One." I love seeing Angela happy. And, Goddess knows, I love Renee's cooking!
Are there other ways of describing men's roles in ways that empower both the women and the men involved?
The Third Time is the Charm
2 months ago
2 comments:
Let's see ...
"Companion:" No. Sounds like a sexless relationship or like NY Times code used when a gay man has died and they want to describe his lover.
"Lover:" No. Sounds like all you do is have sex.
"Boyfriend:" As you mentioned, can be age-inappropriate.
"Significant Other:" too sterile
"Partner:" Obvious business connotations. Also, sounds like code. See "companion," supra.
"Mate:" Weird. Sounds like you live in a laboratory. Obvious animal connotations.
"Consort:" Websters offers the following etymology: Middle English, from Middle French, from Latin consort-, consors partner, sharer, from com- + sort-, sors lot, share. I like the "sharing" implication in "consort." But "consort" can also sound like the man takes a background role in the relationship, e.g., "The Queen's consort." Still, that "sharing" thing is nice. Plus, when people say "consort," I'm willing to bet they do it with tongue firmly impanted in cheek.
Anyway, I'm babbling. But I'm going with "consort."
I'm partial to 'partner'
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