Dear George Bush,
It's your birthday in just a few short hours, and so, today and tomorrow, this blog will be running a special feature: This Is Your Life, George Bush. No. We won't be focusing on your crummy academic record or on your disgraceful performance in the Air National Guard. We won't be talking about the coke arrest that your well-placed daddy got expunged in return for you doing some "community service." Nor will we focus on all the business opportunities that were handed to you that you managed to screw up. We don't think it would be fair to point out that you were asked to leave a board of directors because you had nothing to offer or that the taxpayers of Texas made you a rich man by subsidizing a new ball field for you even though you think it's terrible for folks to live off the government. A little trouble with the SEC? Not for us. We're not going to talk about all the drugs and booze or about your drunk driving conviction. So you mocked a sincere xian and sentenced her to death; that's not what we care about. We're not going to spend your birthday looking at what an abysmal job of parenting you did, especially when contrasted with, oh, say, Bill Clinton or John Kerry. We won't talk about your sleazy campaign tactics or how you stole the 2000 and 2004 elections.
No, we think a much more fitting tribute would be to focus on what you've accomplished during your time in the WH. And, so, with all the fervor we can muster, we say: Happy Birthday, Mr. President. Here's what you'll be remembered for.
You ass.
12 comments:
Local FOX broadcast station was asking viewers what they would give the pResident for this 60th.
I wanted to suggest pretzels, but I figured it might get me a visit from the FBI
jawbone
Execellent series. What do you give a man who has fucked up everything he has ever touched? I know he doesn't have a soul or a conscience but I don't think he could figure out how to use them.
I'd like to give bush an all inclusive invitation to the Hague for the rest of his pathetic life.
Thank youi, Hecate - excellent choice of pictures to remind us all of what we're dealing with. The man is a sociopath and needs to be taken out of that office, along with his administration of thugs.
Absoutely brilliant, Hecate. If only the man were capable of feeling shame or embarassment or guilt.
If I had Warren Buffet's income, I would have paid for a TV ad featuring those images set to the birthday tune, with "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow" tacked on to drive home the point.
W, I salute you on your birthday! [makes appropriate hand gesture]
brilliant, bravo. made my day. thank you gracious lady.
mestizo
You go, girl!
What would I like to give the pres for his b-day? A one-way ticket to Haditha.
Excellent work Hecate! Thank you for all your hard work in putting that together.
Wow, Hecate -
That WOULD leave a mark.
If he were truly human.
Great summary of 5.5 years. I truly fear the next 2.5, given that track record.
July 6th is the Dalai Lama's birthday is you want to focus on someone less...failure like.
Amazing post. Thank you! I long for a time when I don't feel like I have to wear a 'I didn't vote for him' T-shirt by way of apologizing for my nationality...
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